Step 1: I don’t have a problem! …Do I?

In the early stages you aren’t fully aware that something is wrong, but maybe you’re more tired, have stiff shoulders and you’re feeling irritable towards loved ones. Perhaps you’re finding it harder to be in contact with people and have started to avoid things you usually enjoy. We call this the pre-contemplation stage, things aren’t right but you haven’t become fully aware of it yet. You know you're not feeling good but aren't quite sure why or what to do about it.

 

Step 2: I think I have a problem… but what is it? 

Hello to the contemplation stage, in this stage you’re becoming aware that you’re not feeling as good as you have previously.

You’re getting angry quicker than usual and feelings like jealousy, disappointment and a consistent low mood are popping up like a game of whack-a-mole, but your hammer is feeling a little too small for the job. Its getting harder to manage your emotions, your body feels heavy and your shoulders are having their best go at being earings. At night your brain is too noisy to get to sleep and when you finally do, another thought wakes you up and the cycle starts all over again.

You’ve started googling ways to feel happier or more in control like:

“How to stop shouting at my kids.”                        “How to get better sleep”

“How to stop feeling anxious.”

But nothing seems to be helping, every now and again things improve a little bit but you quickly find the problem rising back up again.

 

 

Step 3: ok I need help…. But what and how? 

Ah the planning stage, you have a pretty good idea of what the problem is and you’ve tried a few different things, like talking to friends. Maybe you’ve tried a couple of ideas from your web searches, but they haven’t helped to fix the problem.

You've decided that maybe its time to get some help and you do an online search for “counsellors near me” a few websites and directories pop up and you have a look around for someone to help.

You’ve read “I offer a warm and confidential space” more times than you can count and everyone seems to be saying the same sort of thing. There are so many counsellors and trying to figure out how to choose the right person if feeling like and overwhelming task!

You decide to narrow it down based on logistics like if you can afford their session fee and if they work at times that are good for you. A plan is starting to take shape and you find yourself here where you read something that makes you feel understood and normal.

You're not quite feeling ready to put your plan into action just yet and maybe things have improved a little so you're coping ok, you decide to put it on the back burner for now.

 

Stage 4: Ok I'm ready, lets do this!

Welcome to the Action stage, the final stage of your journey towards starting counselling (or is it?). Things have been tough for a while now, there's may have been some breaks in the storm, but at other times you feel like its going to break you. You’ve tried lots of things but are stuck in a cycle of ups and downs, or maybe you’ve been stuck in a down for a long time already and you don't want to stay there anymore.

You decided it’s time to do something different and enlist some support to help you move forward!

You find yourself here for the first time or maybe you’ve been here before but gone away and come back again (if so, hello again). After another read around my website you decide to get in touch and book a free “getting to know you call” or ask about a half price email session trial.

I reply to your email with an offer to set up a time to chat a bit more about what you're struggling with and how I can help. You take a deep breath and your shoulders drop as relief sweeps over you.

You realise you don’t have to do this alone and there's a light in the darkness to help you find your way out.

 

But what if I'm not ready?

That's ok too!

There is no set time limit for how long it "should" take to move through each of these stages, its normal to revisit each stage a few times before being ready to commit to taking action. You might not even do them in order, maybe you’ve gone from pre-contemplation and then gungho’d straight into Action, panicked and hopped back into contemplation. You’re journey through these stages will be as unique as you are and whatever that looks like is completely normal.

Whether this is your first time to my site or your 700th and whichever stage you’re at right now, you’re welcome to get in touch. Maybe my session fee is too high or I don’t seem to be available at a time that works for you. You’re welcome to drop me an email and ask if there is any way we could make my sessions accessible to you. You don’t have to be ready to commit to working together, but maybe reaching out could remove some of the fear of the unknown and allow you to concrete some aspects of your plan into place.

Whenever you’re ready, I look forward to hearing from you.

Warmly

Kate